It's been a while, hasn't it? Truth be told, I've been thinking of starting a new blog with a slightly different format/focus. I've also been contributing to another blog and that experience has given me some ideas on this, so I thought that once I figured that out I would start the new one and post the link here. But it is taking much longer than I'd planned just to decide on it, and in the meantime I've stopped my chronicling altogether, which really isn't a good thing for me. So why is it so hard to think of what to write? Well, on one hand I would really like to write something with a wider scope - something that chronicles my life in general and not just the career-y part of it. It would also be freer in style and not be anonymous. I know that at surface level this sounds like a terrible idea; against every blogging guideline on theme and focus, completely unoriginal and even more self-indulgent than this blog. But hear me out.
Firstly I do this for myself, so the self-indulgence is justified. Also, I think I have reached a point where I want to practise presenting different types of material in different ways. I am developing all these skills in photography, video-editing, design and in combining different forms of media and I really want to use them. I often find myself wanting to write about experiences or share creations that wouldn't fit here.
But on the other hand, my life is filled with more dropout-related experiences than ever before and, whilst I would love to write about them, there are various complexities that surround this - a need for some degree of anonymity from a reputational & personal safety perspective, the impact that my actions have on others, etc. I tie myself in knots just thinking about it. So the issue is not just the standard writer's block of facing the blank page, but of deciding on the type of paper to use in the first place.
A friend of mine once told me that the blog posts she doesn't publish are the most important ones she writes, and I have certainly had similar experiences. In the end, I suspect I'll find a need and a mechanism for private reflection & analysis that complements a public one. But, for now, until I make time to draw the lines that determine what goes where, I'll be here.
